Summary: Because there are paths meant to be walked forever. Even, just as a memory.
sumi's note: this can be considered as Yunho's version of Stargazing but it stands alone.
"Yunho-shi, can you describe your life so far using only one word?"
The interviewer smiled brightly at the handsome male sitting across her.
A big, wall-clock ticked once, echoing in the small pause before the singer spoke.
"A crossroad," he said without waiting.
The answer caught her off guard, she expected of the man to ponder on it for a while.
"Why is it a crossroad, Yunho-shi?"
"There were people that made such deep paths in our lives. So many paths, it almost feels as if you were a crossroad. The one with arrows pointing towards the last steps they made while making those paths,"
"The funny thing is, you don't need those pointers; arrows are unnecessary," he smiled, "You know whom those paths do belong, you know that special one by heart, just like you can imagine what would last breaths on that path taste like. A sweet tingle of spice and mystery. And a lot of regret."
She kept listening carefully.
"Now, imagine yourself inside your self," he stopped chuckling at the confused look on the woman's face, "I know it's confusing but it makes sense."
"Imagine yourself inside yourself. In your life. There is a big field covered in high green grass stretching to infinity. And then,a crossroad. And you are there standing, watching. Watching people you love, people you once loved, make their way through your life,"
"Few of those paths are of different width and depth; concrete and stone ones. Far cry from the environment they were made in. But, they are fundamental. And then, there are dozens of others, all almost the same, monotonous, breaking somewhere out from your eyes reach. They are those that just were, and just are,"
"And then, you spot that special one. Lonely. Wide a deep. Much more than the rest,"
"Covered in young grass forcing it's way out from the soil. It's edges cutting smaller and smaller, barely visible because of two rows of thick grass hovering over them," he took a deep breath and continued, "It's disappearing slowly."
"No footsteps walked that path for a long time. And... it hurts seeing it that way."
"So, you make a step. That one deciding step away from the crossroad. Away from your daily life,"
"Walk," a smile ," And then, start running."
"Fast, as if your whole life depends on it. Feel the way the grass is squeaking beneath your shoes as you kill it and force it back into the ground. Run. Breathe. Make that path alive again,"
He smiled brightly as if recalling something.
"And also shout. Shout as much as your lungs and throat allow you. Shout until you feel the memories embedded into the soil had woken up, and force their way out and attack your senses,"
That smile. Eyes. Laughter.
The smoothness of alabaster skin beneath your fingertips.
Everything feels so alive.
"And when you feel that familiar ache in your chest, stop and take a big breath. You have seen the memories, now inhale them. Let them spellbound your senses,"
"And all that rush, both adrenalin and emotions, bring tears to your eyes. They are falling, but...it's not pain. It can never be pain. Take a small stone and mark the road,"
"You've come so far for the first time,"
First of many to come.
"Your heart feels more at ease as you walk back; slowly, watching the images the heat of your steps unleashed from the soil. Images, that once made up your whole life, your universe. And the sight of now crumpled grass covering the path brings you a sense of satisfaction."
Locking eyes with the interviewer he smiled, "You will never let it be alone and forgotten. Never again,"
"And, there you are, that familiar crossroad again. Your life. Still the same as you left it while ago, but something is different. But, only you know about that. It's only your secret,"
And it feels just right, she thought as he saw the glint in the singers eyes.
"Why would you do that Yunho-shi?"
"Because, it's the way memories are," he said fondly.
"People leave our lives. They go, disappear. And... there is nothing you can do about that. You need to let them go,"
"But what you can do is hide pieces of them they left behind, hide it deep inside your soul, just like that special path, and keep them safe there. And then, when living becomes so hard you almost feel as if the whole weight of the world is on your shoulders, escape there."
"Walk that familiar path, and smile like a little kid. Some will call it "irresponsible" and escaping the reality, but it doesn't matter what others think," he paused for a moment, and continued with a firm, leader voice, "Not anymore."
"How.. How did it make you feel?"
"Like I'm breathing again. After so much time."