hearty (kas2umi) wrote,

[1/5] Helium

Title: Helium
Pairing: YunJae
Rating: pg13/r
Genre: AU, heavy angst, implied mpreg

Summary: Jaejoong's five year old son Moonbin listens to the stories about Helium - a magical fantasy world where people go when they need 'the deep sleep' - told by the hospital's janitor, Yunho.

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five

Yunho wished he could turn back the hands of time.


The little boy opened his eyes at the sound of crashing metal. Blinking slowly to beat the sleepiness that had overcome his body, he looked to his left seeking the source of the noise.

"I apologize, I didn't mean to wake you up," A man, probably in his mid thirties, spoke slowly as he collected the equipment that had fallen onto the floor. A plate was gripped firmly in his hand while the other one held a small metallic-like bowl.

The boy sleepily followed the man's form as he moved around the room. Just as the janitor was about to wipe the surface of the table next to the bed the boy was laying on, he knocked over a cup and smiled nervously. Looking over at the boy he chuckled. "Sorry, it's my first day at work."

"You are pretty clumsy." Moonbin spoke as the man continued dusting the wooden counter on the right side of the hospital bed.

Shaking his head in slight amusement and nervousness Yunho's eyes drifted to a small model of the rigid airship that had a wavy Hindenburg painted on it. The ceiling was almost covered in small models of air balloons as they hung on almost invisible threads the man assumed must have been silk.

"My son was crazy about those," he spoke to the boy while rinsing the dirt covered piece of cloth. He was almost done.

"How old is he?"

Yunho ignored his question as he continued. "I remember he had a really cool one, from Russia."

Moonbin lifted his arm pointing at a colorful air balloon. "That one is also from Russia."

When the man didn't say a word the boy's eyes wandered towards the ceiling.

He just stared.


The noon was the time for a much needed break for Yunho.

It was about to rain but he still had some time to spend it in the fresh air. Sitting on the wooden bench in the hospital's garden he took out his worn out notebook and started writing inside it. But he was distracted as soon as he caught the sight of a nurse pushing that same little boy from before in a wheelchair.

She paused for a moment before telling the boy to wait just a bit, until she goes to get something.

He had a small aircraft in his hands and was toying with the rear propellers.

"Hello again," He spoke cheerfully trying to get the boy's attention.

"Hello," Moonbin spoke almost dismissively and Yunho took it as a sign to get back to his notebook. But before he could continue writing the boy's voice stole his attention once more.

"Do you think your son is in heaven?" He flicked the propeller of his toy plane while asking.

Yunho frowned at the sudden question as he stared at the boy. "What do you mean?"

"Isn't he dead?"

Taking in a deep breath Yunho stared emptily at the half empty page in his notebook. "For a long time now, yes."

Few moments of silence followed as Moonbin stared at the sky before toying with his plane again. "People say I will go to Heaven."

"Who told you that?"

The boy answered as if it was a wide know fact. "The doctors. Everyone," he paused. "Mostly my mama."

'His mother,' Yunho repeated in his head. The word burned. He didn't know what to say.

"They say I will fall into a deep sleep, like the bears do in the winter," he pouted. "But i don't want to sleep for that long."

It was harder than he thought it would be. His chest hurt as he tried not to let out the painful feelings inside his chest. Getting his emotions in check Yunho smiled at him. "Nah, don't worry that's just a long nap." He tried to hide the tremble in his own voice.

Moonbin's face was emotionless as he spoke. "To me Heaven seems to be a boring place."

Gazing at the sky Yunho found it hard to reply. "I- I'm not so sure. At least there is a lot of space." As their gazes locked he smiled at the boy. His eyes reminded him of someone he used to know. "Though you might get a bit lonely."

The nurse was back in that moment and Yunho watched at she took the boy away before directing his gaze towards the sky once again.

He simply stared.


Various pens and markers were scattered all over the bed as Yunho came in in the evening to clean the boy's room as he was determined to do.

"Good evening," he greeted him and took hold of a mop and started cleaning the floor. Moonbin didn't look up from his papers.


After few moments of silence Yunho finally decided to speak about what has been bugging his mind for few days now.

"Uhm," he began nervously while gripping the mop. "Have you heard about the Helium?"

At that last word the boy looked up. "The gas in the balloons?"


Leaving the mop aside he sat near the boy's feet and asked him. "What do you think where it comes from?"

Shaking his head cutely Moonbin pouted. "I don't know."

"The Helium has it's own world," Yunho began. "A magic place, like in a fairy tale, you wouldn't believe your own eyes if you saw it."

Moobin was listening carefully as if entranced. "Everything is so bright and floating in the air."

"I didn't know that," he said with his small eyes wide from the excitement.

Yunho pouted as if in disbelief. "That's weird. The Helium is where you awake after a long sleep. But first you have to fly to there withe the Helium Express."

"What's an Express?"

Yunho pointed above their heads to the small Hindenburg. "It's very similar to this aircraft. They're all almost the same."

As his interest was stolen Moonbin inched closer to the janitor. "What about the cockpit?"

"The cockpit?"

"Yeah, is it red?" The boy asked excitedly.

"Yes," Yunho nodded frantically. "Exactly."

"With a lion head at the front and wings at the sides?" Moonbin motioned with his hands.

Yunho leaned closer. "Exactly like that, if I remember correctly."

At those words the boy turned around and took a small wooden box from the night table. Opening it he took out a piece of paper and showed it to the janitor. "Is it like this?"

Looking at the flaming red drawing of a rigid plane Yunho freigned a gasp. "It's exactly the same."

As if he had won a million dollar prize Moonbin beamed. "I knew there had to be someplace else but Heaven. What else is there on Helium?"

Yunho's smile flattered slightly and whispering he told the boy. "I have to get back to work." Getting up he didn't miss the sad look on the boy's face and before he could stop himself he spoke. "Tomorrow?"

Moobin followed his steps towards the door. "You promise?"

"Yes, of course. I promise." Yunho didn't have it in himself to turn around and face the boy one last time. "See you tomorrow."

"See you," the boy trailed off as he stared at his drawing.

It was another night spent in pain.


sumi's note: this is heavily based of Helium but there will be plot twists of course. And to warn you, it might get quite angsty.

Tags: fic: helium, length: chaptered, pairing: yunho/jaejoong
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